To introduce mom to the amazing features of a smart phone I gifted her a Micromax Android phone on her Anniversary. Since she uses her phone just for calling and at most to listen to music, i guessed she would find it difficult to cope with a more advanced operating system like Android. But she has picked up the intricacies of Android so fast that I can no longer answer her queries. She just took a couple of months to figure out that the 1GHz processor Micromax was a junk phone and the amazing specs (on paper) could no longer convince her. She wanted a better Android phone. (The Micromax is now happy being accepted in the noble family of old 1100, w700i etc)
That is when I gave her my basic "LG Optimus One" phone which I was using happily for the past two years. And within two days she crashed the custom ICS rom I had flashed on it and the phone just went dead. She said she was playing with some settings and the phone went to a really long sleep (Somehow i could never do it in my two years of Android usage). She started cursing me for the poor visibility of ICS rom and it was no longer easy to toggle Wi-Fi etc. Somehow I convinced her that it's Google's mistake and not mine and with lot of pains recovered the stock ROM for her liking.
Since then there is no looking back and she now configures Wi-Fi on her phone and shares images with her friends over Bluetooth. she has already picked up words like "download", "upload" and replies in whatsapp using things like "OK cool". Is always glued to her phone till late nights and also had several visits to Eye specialists. She now helps her friends to upload apps on their phone (upload=install in her dictionary, also Internet=Google=Wi-Fi). But her deep dive into the world of Android and her one-one with recent technologies was not always easy on my brain and my ego of being an Engineer. As I get blamed for most of the bugs introduced in Android by Google or any other developer of Apps. Following are some of her duels with Android/me:
Mom vs my M.Tech (round 1):
Mom: What is the difference between 2G, 3G and 2GB,3GB?
Me: aaahmmmm! 2G is second generation of wireless technology. The gsm technology we use for calling is 2G or rather 2.5G. 3G is third generation which provides higher speed internet these days. 2GB is 2 Gigabyte's a measure of memory. More is the memory more songs you can store.
Mom: !!!! (puzzled) what are you talking about?
Me: 2G is for Sim card 2GB is for SD card.
Mom: What is the difference between 2G, 3G and 2GB,3GB?
Me: aaahmmmm! 2G is second generation of wireless technology. The gsm technology we use for calling is 2G or rather 2.5G. 3G is third generation which provides higher speed internet these days. 2GB is 2 Gigabyte's a measure of memory. More is the memory more songs you can store.
Mom: !!!! (puzzled) what are you talking about?
Me: 2G is for Sim card 2GB is for SD card.
Mom vs YouTube update: I thought of surprising mom with the new YouTube interface and updated it myself. Somehow her search history got messed up.
Mom: what did you do to my phone. I can no longer see comedy and cookery shows I had on my YouTube
Me: Those were just initial "Recommendations". You can always search for them.
Mom: Idiot don't ever touch my phone!
Mom: what did you do to my phone. I can no longer see comedy and cookery shows I had on my YouTube
Me: Those were just initial "Recommendations". You can always search for them.
Mom: Idiot don't ever touch my phone!
Mom vs WhatsApp: On profile pictures of other users, showing in whatsapp
Mom: Why do people put their photos on "my" Whatsapp?
Me: !! %&@!! (Puzzled)
Mom: Delete them I don't want them on my phone.
Me: &@%#+&#! (Slightly dizzy)
Me: !! %&@!! (Puzzled)
Mom: Delete them I don't want them on my phone.
Me: &@%#+&#! (Slightly dizzy)
Mom vs YouTube:
Mom: How do I download songs from YouTube?
Me: (Wondering how to explain her the Google policy on app market!) You need an app for that which is not available on Google play. You have to get Tubemate etc
Mom: OK cool
Me: !!
Mom: How do I download songs from YouTube?
Me: (Wondering how to explain her the Google policy on app market!) You need an app for that which is not available on Google play. You have to get Tubemate etc
Mom: OK cool
Me: !!
Mom vs my M.Tech(round 2):
Mom: What is the difference between Wi-Fi and the Internet?
Me: aah mmm (using experience from past will try to explain in kannada) Wi-Fi is a "Maadhyam" (medium) and internet is a "Saulabhya"(facility). Wi-Fi may provide internet but not vice versa. E.g Wi-Fi is like a plate in which you serve food called internet.
Mom: This is the stupidest example I have ever heard!
Wife: He is fooling around with you mother-in-law. Internet is nothing like that.
Me: %#?@+???
Mom: Idiot explain it in English
Me: I don't know :( ( my M.Tech proved useless again)
Mom: What is the difference between Wi-Fi and the Internet?
Me: aah mmm (using experience from past will try to explain in kannada) Wi-Fi is a "Maadhyam" (medium) and internet is a "Saulabhya"(facility). Wi-Fi may provide internet but not vice versa. E.g Wi-Fi is like a plate in which you serve food called internet.
Mom: This is the stupidest example I have ever heard!
Wife: He is fooling around with you mother-in-law. Internet is nothing like that.
Me: %#?@+???
Mom: Idiot explain it in English
Me: I don't know :( ( my M.Tech proved useless again)
Experiences like these have definitely made me lot more patient these days :). Sharing this hoping that Google might hire her to test their future Android releases.
This is really hilarious!! I have had to field some of these questions too and I know exactly how you fall short of words and examples to explain!
ReplyDeleteThe best I have heard is "Nanna phone smart-u? nimmadhu smart-aa? Nammadhu yaavdho "ice-cream" anthe (the OS!), nimmadhu bread-aa? Update maadkoLi swami!"
lol :D This is even more hilarious :)
DeleteIt is as if I am going through the everyday story b/w me and my Papa ;)..was fun to read!! :)
ReplyDeleteOMG!! Hilarious maxx.. Kamath at his best again. & made me mumble anecdotes of my granny vs celphone..
ReplyDeleteThanks Hiral :)
DeleteRohit, amazing blog man....thats really funny....i have similar experiences too :-)
ReplyDeleteThanks Yogesh
DeletePolitics & FDA clearance of 2 stem cell clinic COVID-19 efforts
ReplyDeleteFDA is doing better job on unproven stem cell clinics, but it has cleared many INDs, some iffy, for stem cell and cellular medicine trials for COVID-19.
The FDA and its CBER branch have been doing a good job overall in the last 3+ years to tackle the unproven stem cell clinic problem, but lately on the stem cells for COVID-19 front there is reason for real concern.
I believe the agency is taking on major risk overall by clearing a vast number of cell therapy trials for COVID-19 mostly without much data, but the clearance of a few programs by for-profit stem cell clinics is especially problematic in my view.
FDA on the ball more generally on clinics
For background and on the positive, the FDA is taking the problem of the stem cell clinic industry very seriously and taking action on clinic firms that are injecting patients with unapproved stem cell drugs.
It has sent off dozens of untitled and warning letters to clinic firms pitching unproven stem cells and other regenerative biologics like exosomes. The agency’s biologics branch called CBER is really on the ball on this these days. Its Director Peter Marks deserves big kudos for the serious commitment and marathon work here over many years to make things happen on this problem. Dr. Marks was the subject of an interesting piece in the WaPo by Laurie McGinley recently: Meet the most important federal official you probably don’t know — the man who holds the fate of the coronavirus vaccine in his hands.